[TIP TUESDAY] How to Find Simple Happiness

This Tuesday’s Tip:

Part 1:

Go easy on yourself

No good ever came from all the self judgements and criticisms most of us have running through our minds (conscious & subconsciously) on a daily (hourly, minute by minute) loop. In fact, a lot of harm (to our relationship with self and others) comes when we have difficulty empathizing with ourselves. 

So go easy on yourself

Your space is a disaster? There are worse things.

The laundry has been sitting around getting more wrinkled all week? There must have been more important things to attend to.

You fail to go to bed on time and wake up exhausted? There’s always tomorrow.

You yell at the kids when your patience is at an all time low? Your children see that you are human and apologies are beautiful.

I’m currently in a space of needing to constantly remind myself that:

Everything is Always Working Out for Me…

I Am Enough...

I Am Exactly Where I Need to Be...

I Am Surrounded By a Sea of Support.

These are things that I believe deep down in my soul. But there are experiences held in my tissues, in my muscle memory, in my habits, that contradict those beliefs, that make my old patterning take over with a whole slew of judgement.

Most of this is coming from feeling a lack of energy, the need to focus in on more important things, to allow my body to transition into this more inward time of year where I could sleep for ages, and sometimes need to to feel fully aligned.

And I am doing my best to be okay with that…To Go Easy On Myself.

When I don’t, I spend more time falling into the depths of feeling like I’m not enough, and less time making the progress I so desire.

So go easy on yourself.

Align with the energies of ease and flow and life will be so much easier.

When I need a boost in this department, I like to take a dance break to this tune of Amy Steinberg’s--right here in my office. Can’t get enough of it.

That’s Part 1 of today’s tip: Go easy on yourself

Here’s Part 2:

Find the thorn in your side

Yup, go easy on yourself, but... find that thing that is continually getting to you, that won’t go away no matter how much you ignore it or pretend it's not there.

Recognize the ways that your space, your things, a person or situation is bringing out the worst in you. It's hard to go easy on yourself when something is needling away in your side.

I do my best to live in that realm of total responsibility--knowing that I attract the reality to me that enables me to learn the lessons I need to learn to get to those places I yearn to be.

This means that I am responsible for noticing what doesn't serve me--for noticing the things I hold on to that make my life more difficult--and doing something about it.

I am responsible for my own happiness on this journey.

And believe me, there are a few in my life right now that I am working on releasing.  

There is a subtle difference between removing yourself from a situation because it makes your life hard, and moving past the situation because you’ve learned the lesson you need to learn. The difference is, the lesson will follow you wherever you go… until you learn it.

I’m in the midst of working on some efficiency pieces that can majorly bend my time--that allow me to have incredibly focused time to get my work done quickly and enjoyably. I am also working on delegating, letting go of control. It's a beautiful thing--and hard. 

Letting go of the things in my life that don’t inspire joy (the things I used to do because I thought only I could do a good job) is a major lesson for me right now. Stepping away from the hard parts of my life won’t help me learn that lesson. Sticking with those harder parts, but letting go of the things that don't bring me joy, is what will help me learn my lesson.

The thorn in my side right now is all the stuff that doesn’t bring me joy, that I do anyway (because I think it’s easier or faster--though in the end it never is).

This means strengthening my relationships; this means reaching out when I need help: two things that do not come naturally to me, but feel so good when I do them.

What’s the thorn in your side?

Do you resent picking up after your kids or your partner but aren’t willing to do that upfront work with your own things that would allow you to let go of that daily frustration?

Do you complain about all the stuff, but still spend your time dealing with it instead of getting to the heart of the problem?

Do you have a hard time feeling your own joy, knowing what that feels like in your body, or feeling justified listening to it?

Do you feel a heavy weight every time you come into your home, but haven’t reached out for help?

Everyone has a thorn that needles away until you find it. Once you do, life has the potential to be so much more comfortable, easier, more enjoyable. I promise.

So go easy on yourself, AND... find that thorn in your side.

Stay tuned for some exciting ways I will help you do just that--coming soon! Or… if you’re ready now, reach out and we’ll find a time to connect for a complimentary session to talk about where you are, where you'd rather be and how to get you there.

Here’s to finding simple happiness in your own life,  

:) Tenaya